As everyone knowing me, knows I am a thinker. But addition to that not just a thinker, but also worker, creator, not a dreamer so much, though. I am not most social person, but have always kept focus on doing, working, reaching something that really matters somehow. And that’s the thing so many forgets; we all experience everything our own personal way and not always our own experience matches to others. That can be frustrating, to me it has been as well as there was a time I felt no one understood me. More people I met, more disappointed I got. Today I feel it’s all enough, and same time actually the biggest thing to reach, that I am understanding myself. Understanding how do I feel and why do I feel that way.

The fact is I am not most easy person to understand, though I am actually very simple person. I mean simple the way I do tell what I think, though I never say it the way I would hurt someone. I am polite. I always think before I speak, well, today I need to think even more as my brain function has became so slow. It has not improved during a year so much. I do not give contradictory signals and I always stand on my words. I am sensitive person while being strong, someone would say a very strong. But after all I never, ever, give up with being smart.

I feel it is sad and such a pity people so hard and even aggressive way keep finding something. Finding company, finding someone to love, finding someone loving them, finding someone who could understand them, finding someone accepting them.. The best things in my life has always happened by working hard and following my sense and heart in a balance, not by searching I have found anything very meaningful or long-lasting. Still I feel even the more sad thing is that most of people keep focus on what they see and what they see somehow gives the purpose for their feelings. This makes me think what feeling something actually means for people today? Do they even understand what feeling is for.